Why Relapse Happens And What It Could Mean (ROCD/RA)
The Awaken into Love Newsletter
Disclaimer: this is our invitation for you to check in if you feel you are going into compulsive behavior with ROCD/RA content. If so, save this post for later when you’re not feeling compulsive. Please also note that each personal ROCD/RA story is different, which means, some parts may or may not resonate with you. As always, take what helps for your heart, and leave the rest.
Quote of the Week
Your inspirational tip from the Awaken into Love Team
“ROCD/RA teaches you to lean into uncertainty, and to learn to embrace imperfection. Learning this is a core skill in today’s world - so you can learn to become a safe anchor to yourself and one for others”
– Manon (Awaken into Love Director)
✨ ROCD/RA: The Truth About Relapse
Your Weekly Insight on ROCD/RA & Healing
Hi love,
Relapsing in Relationship OCD (ROCD) or Relationship Anxiety (RA) isn’t about “losing progress.” It’s not proof that you’re failing or that something is wrong with you or your relationship. More often than not, it’s a sign that something deeper is happening beneath the surface.
If you’re feeling like you’ve “gone backward,” consider these—we’ve listed 3 out of other reasons which you can find in the ROCD Academy:
✨ You might be unknowingly engaging in compulsions again. Compulsions don’t always look obvious. They can be as subtle as mentally reviewing your partner’s qualities, replaying past conversations, or seeking reassurance in ways you don’t even recognize. These small, sneaky behaviors fuel the cycle, making it feel like your anxiety is “back.”
✨ Your nervous system might be overwhelmed. ROCD/RA isn’t just about thoughts—it’s a full-body experience. Stress, exhaustion, or even unrelated anxiety can heighten your sensitivity to intrusive doubts. When your nervous system is dysregulated, your brain looks for something to grasp onto—and your relationship often becomes the easiest target.
✨ You may be stepping into a new stage of healing and integration. Relapse isn’t always regression. Sometimes, your brain is revisiting old fears one last time before it’s ready to let them go. Growth isn’t linear, and discomfort is often a sign that deeper healing is happening beneath the surface.
✨ You might be chasing certainty instead of embracing uncertainty. One of the biggest struggles in ROCD/RA recovery is the urge to feel 100% sure. But the truth is, no one feels completely certain all the time—not even in the healthiest relationships. The key isn’t in finding certainty; it’s in learning to coexist with doubt without letting it define you.
✨ A life transition or stressor could be at play. Big changes—moving in together, engagement, new responsibilities—can awaken old fears. This doesn’t mean something is wrong with your relationship. It just means your brain is responding to uncertainty the way it always has. But this time, you have the awareness to meet it differently.
The truth is, there are so many reasons why we feel like we’re relapsing. But no matter how intense it feels, it’s never a failure. It’s not a reset. It’s not square one. It’s just a turn in the road, sometimes even a deepening. And if you keep walking, you’ll find that this moment—however painful—is leading you somewhere important.
So take a breath. Go back to the basics. Meet yourself with kindness. And above all, remember: You are never starting over.
#YANA
The Awaken Into Love Team ❤️
📝 Have a question about ROCD/RA? Reply to this email—we might feature it in our next newsletter!
🎬 WHAT’S NEW AT AWAKEN INTO LOVE
🔗 ROCD/RA tells you that breaking up will “prove” your love—but that’s a trap
In this new video, we talk about breakup urges—a common and painful ROCD/RA struggle that can feel so overwhelming. ❤️ You’re not alone, love. You can watch here.
🔜 WHAT’S COMING AT AWAKEN INTO LOVE
Wednesday, March 5th, 1pm MST - ROCD/RA HOME group session
Wednesday, March 12th, 1pm MST - ROCD/RA HOME group session
Thursday, March 13th, 1pm MST - LIVE Q&A in the ROCD Academy
Monday, March 17th, 11am MST - ROCD/RA HOME group session
Monday, March 24th, 11am MST - ROCD/RA HOME group session
⭐️ AWAKEN INTO LOVE ROCD SUCCESS STORIES
🎧 A SONG FOR YOU (#YANA)
These songs are sent and recommended by our community members when they are struggling. You can send us your requests too on Instagram at @withawakenintolove :)
🌹 OUR OFFERINGS & SERVICES
—> More details about the ROCD/RA Academy HERE
—> More details about HOME HERE
—>More details about the AIL Coaches HERE
IMPORTANT: This newsletter is meant to bring you the education, information, inspiration, and motivation. It is not meant to replace professional therapy but can help educate and support you along the process. Please note that all the material provided by Awaken into Love such as this newsletter, courses, coaching and community are not meant to diagnose you or treat a mental health disorder, it's just intended to educate and support you.