You Are Never Alone
The Awaken into Love Newsletter
Disclaimer: this is our invitation for you to check in if you feel you are going into compulsive behavior with ROCD/RA content. If so, save this post for later when you’re not feeling compulsive. Please also note that each personal ROCD/RA story is different, which means, some parts may or may not resonate with you. As always, take what helps for your heart, and leave the rest.
Quote of the Week
Your inspirational tip from the Awaken into Love Team
“Your healing journey is full of detours. Trust them. All routes lead back to yourself anyway.” –Kiyomi LaFleur (AIL founder)
📕 Journal Entry from an ROCD/RA Sufferer
Personal and raw ROCD journal entries from Relationship OCD & Relationship Anxiety sufferers to help you build your “compassion muscle”
💌 Dear Awakened Self,
I feel a bit embarassed talking about sex with you... sex hasn’t interested me. It feels like a waste of time. Not just sex actually. Love, relationship, being in a couple…all of it just feels boring, dull, a lost cause. I’m not interested anymore. It feels like a chore. I feel so good alone, immersed in my books, my notebooks, my routines, my pets, my adventures on my own. Romantic relationship seems unnecessary, pointless, just too much really. Something that piles up on the list of things I have to do, I need to work on. I’m bored. I’m annoyed. It feels heavy. I feel a lot guilt for writting those words: shame and fear entwined making me sick to my stomach...I just want to be alone, all the time. Disconnection scares me but feels pretty cosy too, actually. Maybe, our relationship is just not right. What do we share? Not so much these days. It’s like it doesn’t even mean so much to me really. I don’t know. I am terrified. What’s the point? Sometimes, we love each other. Others we don’t. I don’t know. I am feeling numb. I escape. I run away. I walk deep in the forest. I isolate myself pretending to work. I feel enough alone.I don’t feel passion nor interest anymore. They say it’s a sign, a clear sign the relationship might be outdated. Can exist on my own? Is it only either or: me OR the other? Could both coexist? I think I’m struggling with de-fusion. It’s so confusing, so…new. A part of me thinks it’s only possible to love and be in a relationship fully or not at all. One OR the other. If I feel good within myself, then I can’t feel good with him. One OR the other. I am lost.
Love,
–My Anxious Obsessive-Mind
✨ Dear anxious-obsessive mind,
Your brilliant mind is full of so many questions. I see you. I hear you. So many questions knocking at your door, contradicting themselves, exhausting your tender heart. I’m hearing something wonderful though. Something I’m so proud of you for: you feeling good with yourself. I just want to pause and name that. It’s not always been this way. At times, being intimate with your own self felt like death, felt like nothingness, not even an option. How far you’ve come! I’m so proud of you. We shall take some time to celebrate that. Moving away from wholeness-giveaway-syndrom (as we call “codependency” at Awaken into Love) is a scary journey.
We want it so bad, then when we have it, we realize there are deeper layers of fear sneaking out. It is human, it makes sense. You’ve been taught and conditionned to think…that love should only be butterflies, passions and wanting to share everything, 24/7. It is not the case, my love. Love is full of moments of disconnection, of estrangement and distance, before the tide comes back up in its own divine timing. Sometimes the low tide lingers. And, as we obsess about it lingering, it feels like we’ve been stuck there forever. You’ve been told it’s either or. That love and disenchantment can’t coexist. Nor interest and boredom. Nor aloneness and togetherness. I trust it can. I trust it’s the beauty of life, how those paradoxes dance with eachother. How can you let this moment in time lingers slightly longer, lean into your fullness of self for once and trust it?
Love,
–Your Awakening Self
🎬 WHAT’S NEW AT AWAKEN INTO LOVE…
🔗 Kiyomi’s Answers Your Question…
If you feel frustrated on your healing journey with Relationship OCD and Relationship Anxiety, then this video is for you. What many people don't realize is that understanding your expectations and beliefs around healing can litterally change the trajectory of your healing journey. Find out why you may feeling frustrated in your journey and what you can do to feel more empowered to keep going.
(Click HERE for the newest video)
🔜 WHAT’S COMING
November 15th: NEW YOUTUBE VIDEO: Manon (Awaken into Love Director) Personal & Exclusive ROCD/RA Story
✍🏻 ROCD/RA SUCCESS STORIES
❤️ “It is powerful beyond words to be in a community of people who understand and are there for you very week!”
❤️ “It made me feel seen and feel like I have a community where people understand what I am going through.”
❤️ “Awaken into Love literally saved my life”
❤️ “I remember always thinking "what is wrong with me"?, "why can't I have a normal relationship like everyone else?" or "am I even just not made for relationship"? and feeling just so confused. I felt SO relieved when I found AIL, finally someone understood me"
🎧 A SONG (from our heart to yours)
🌹OUR OFFERINGS & SERVICES
—> More details about the ROCD/RA Academy HERE
—> More details about HOME HERE
—>More details about the AIL Coaches HERE
IMPORTANT: This newsletter is meant to bring you the education, information, inspiration, and motivation. It is not meant to replace professional therapy but can help educate and support you along the process. Please note that all the material provided by Awaken into Love such as this newsletter, courses, coaching and community are not meant to diagnose you or treat a mental health disorder, it's just intended to educate and support you.